A Search, A Blonde and Reflections

Editor’s Note: Remember, some aircraft have two wheels.

From Time to time we get requests from readers for assistance-some are easy to handle, others not so as is the case with the request below which comes from Captain Thomas Mildenberger, who flies for what he says is a “bigger German airline.”

His email reads in part as follows: “As an intensive hobby, I am researching about a distinctive German sports plane, the Heinkel He64.

“During my research I came across an almost unreadable reproduction of an article about “Little Um tali Forms Gliding Club” in the issue (he does not say which newspaper or magazine) of January 1937, where a picture of the Heinkel sold to a Mr. Perrem is printed.”

(For the record, Um tali in those days was part of the then Southern Rhodesia).

Capt .Mildenberger continues: “I am very much interested to get a good reproduction, if possible together with the permit, to show it on my website. I would be very grateful if you could help me acquiring one, since I don’t have access here in Germany, except via Internet.”

This is a real tough one. It goes back some 77 years.

Is there anyone out there who can help? If so, please contact Capt Mildenberger on his email tmildenberger@netcologne.de or visit his website at http://www.he64.com.please keep me posted as well.

Blonde In Air Airliner

This piece comes from Ed Hirsch, our US Editor in Miami, and is published here with apologies to all those long-suffering people of the female gender who happen to have blonde hair-real or otherwise:

An airliner is on its way to Toronto, Canada, when a blonde in economy class gets up and moves to the first class section and sits down in an empty seat. The flight attendant watches her do this, approaches her and asks to see her ticket.

She then tells the blonde that she paid for economy class and that she will have to sit in the back.

The blonde replies: “I’m blonde. I’m beautiful. I’m going to Toronto and I’m staying right here.”

The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the Captain and the Co-pilot that there is a blonde bimbo sitting in first class, who belongs in economy and wont move back to her seat.

With that, the co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.

The blonde replies: I’m blonde .I’m beautiful, I’m going to Toronto and I’m staying right here.”

The co-pilot tells the captain that they probably should have the police waiting for them when they land to arrest this blonde woman who won’t listen to reason.

The captain thinks for a moment and then says: “You say she is blonde? I’ll handle this. I’m married to a blonde. I speak blonde.”

Leaving the cockpit, he goes back to the blonde and whispers in her ear.

She looks up at him and says: “Oh, I’m sorry.”

Without any further fuss, she gets up and goes back to her seat in economy.

Both the flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss.

“I told her: “First Class isn’t going to Toronto.”

Old Pilots Reflections

The following “reflections” have been doing the rounds for many years and so much so that the identity of the original author has long since faded from memory.

However, they have resurfaced -this time in the newsletter of the Mashonaland Flying Club ( Harare,Zimbabwe) which, in turn ,received them from a member ,who, in turn, received them from a friend in Canada and were ultimately sent to us to pass on to readers. Here goes:

Pilots are people who drive airplanes for other people who can’t fly. Passengers are people who say they fly, but really just ride.

Fighter pilots are steely eyed, weapons systems managers who kill badly people and break things. However, they can also be very charming and personable.

The average fighter pilot, despite sometimes having a swaggering exterior, is very much capable of such feelings as love, affection, intimacy and caring.However; these feelings don’t involve anyone else.

Flying is a hard way to earn an easy living.

Both optimists and pessimists contribute to aviation. The optimist invents the airplane; the pessimist, the parachute.

Death is just nature’s way of telling you to watch your airspeed.

As a pilot, only two bad things can happen to you (and one of them will) : Firstly ,One day you will walk out of the aircraft, knowing it is your last flight, or, Secondly, one day you will walk out to the aircraft ,not knowing it is your last flight.

There are rules and there are laws. The rules are made by men who think that they know how to fly your airplane better than you. The laws (of physics) were ordained by God. You can- and sometimes should- suspend the rules, but you can never suspend the laws.

About Rules

The rules are good place to hide if you don’t have a better idea and the talent to execute it. If you deviate from a rule, it must be flawless performance. For example: If you fly under a bridge, don’t hit the bridge.

Before each flight, make sure that your bladder is empty and your fuel tanks are full.

He who demands everything that his aircraft can give him is a pilot; he who demands one iota more is a fool.

There are certain aircraft sounds that can only be heard at night and over the ocean. Most of them are scary.

The aircraft limits are only there in case there is another flight by that particular aircraft. If subsequent flights do not appear likely, there are no limits.

“If we Wright brothers were alive today, Wilbur would have to fire Orville to reduce costs -this quote is attributed to a former president of Delta Airlines.

In the Alaskan bush, it is better to have a two-hour bladder and three hours of gas than vice verse.

An old pilot is one who can remember when flying was dangerous and sex was safe.

Airlines have really changed; now a flight attendant can get a pilot pregnant.

I’ve flown in both pilot seats. Can someone tell me why the other one is always occupied by an idiot?

You have to make up your mind about growing up and becoming a pilot. You can’t do both.

 

Author Bio: Anthony A Juma is the Editor and Director Commercial and Flights Operations at Wings Over Africa Aviation Limited. This is an Air Charter Company that specializes on Air News on Pilot Training courses. The website has guided thousands of travelers to achieve their dream holiday. For more information and guidance, visit the site at http://www.wingsoverafrica-aviation.com/index.php/flight-news.html

 

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